When you bring home that newborn baby does anyone ever realize how mush harder it will be when they start school? I mean really?
We had parent teacher conferences this week and Lady Bug's was first.... nothing of real concern other than her chatting too much (but even that is improving).
Next we had Lefty's... nothing of real concern here either. He is doing really well and was very serious the first part of the school year but the teacher says she has recently started seeing him "let loose" a little and not be so serious.
Then it was off to Spirit's conference... well, not sure where to start. We have noticed over the last few months that his confidence is going in the toilet which is reflective of his grades now. His grades have taken a serious dip since September and aren't showing any signs of improving at this point. How can a kid who is in the 4th grade but reads at a 9th grade level have self-confidence issues? How can a kid who is in an advanced math class have self confidence issues? Is it because he is too hard on himself? possibly. I just don't know where to go. The teachers tell me that he isn't giving it effort, if he doesn't "get it" immediately then he just shuts down. I complained to the teachers, being careful not to give Spirit any excuses, that he is only in 4th grade and having him leave the classroom throughout the day for different classes doesn't appear to be working. What they do is group each of the 4th graders, regardless of your homeroom class, into a group based on the skill level. So Spirit is in the group of 4th graders that are in advanced math, and also an advanced reading group, then of course he leaves homeroom for science, music, p.e., and art as well. BUT, the catchy thing here is that he will leave homeroom for the advanced math but return to his homeroom for the last 15 minutes and is expected to the homeroom math as well. Same goes for Reading/Literacy. Which means, he gets an assignment from the group AND homeroom. Not so much for literacy assignments, but I notice with the math that he misses the instruction time on it and has to figure it out on his own (which most times he can, others he struggles). The teachers recognize this an issue, not just for Spirit but other kids as well. BUT, is that the reason his self confidence and the lack of motivation in school and the dips in grades? He got a D in science. He loves science! I am at a loss and want to cry for him. On the way out of the school he looked at his dad with tears in his eyes and said "I will do better from now on. I promise."
Parenting is so hard! I wouldn't trade it for the world, but man oh man is it painfully hard at times!
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4 comments:
Awwww his little comment at the end is so sweet! Sounds like a smart kid! Is he rewarded at school (or home) when he succeeds with good grades? I know for me if the reward at the end is better than the struggle getting there, then it helps me push through the task. That is the only way I get through being hard on myself.
I'm so sorry for these rough times. Been through it here, too. You will find your ways to deal with it, but I agree that is can be horribly hard!
It just sounds like he is completely overloaded! Maybe he's not giving it his all because he is tired from having extra math and extra reading??
And I'm sure he is putting extra pressure on himself because he knows he is smart and he knows you expect him to make great grades.
Is there any sort of tutoring? Perhaps this could help him with his homeroom math. Have you asked him what he thinks he needs? Sometimes the kids know better than we do.
The only real advice I can give you is to cover him in prayer. Pray the he has confidence in his God give abilities and pray that God shows you what Spirit needs.
i have read this, but honestly not known how to respond, a few times now... :(
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